As with most guys who express an interest in sex, I have gone through a phase where I wanted to explore my dominant sexual power. I have always felt that dominance has been an inborn trait in most men, especially within myself, and I wanted to know exactly what it meant for me to desire it. Was I being an a-typical guy who wanted to seek power over a female to dominate in bed? When I did finally explore it, would it be the only way that I could find pleasure? Would it make me a better person? Worse? Would it matter at all?
Finding a partner who was willing to explore this with me proved to be difficult to say the least. As a rather picky individual, I sought out someone who was already experienced in the matter. Someone who had been with dominant partners before and who would be able to teach me more about my cravings, show me a way to fulfill them without bumbling around like some schoolboy all over again. I wasn’t looking forward to that – I didn’t even know what I really wanted from this crazing, only that it demanded some sort of release that I did not know how to give.
After some time, I did find a partner who helped me explore that facet of myself. It was an incredibly enlightening experience and remains to be so. Because of it, I’ve come to doubt the belief that I will ever be able to find someone who is ever going to satisfy all of my needs. It sounds like an arrogant, masochistic thing to say but I firmly believe that people are far too complex to be completely satisfied by one person in their life. What would I have to sacrifice in order to be with just one person?